Back to school season is usually in August and September, but this school year it’s a whole new ballgame! Some schools started remote in the fall with a return to hybrid or in person classes later in the year, others are going remote now after an in-person start with plans to return after the holidays. “Back to school” has been happening in many different shapes and forms and it can be hard for children to manage all the different transitions.

That’s part of this parenting gig though — helping our children do hard things! To work through this together and make back to school less stressful for everyone, use the tips below. It’s going to be an adjustment, but you can do this! (Looking to add some fun to take away some of the scariness? Try celebrating School Year's Eve on the night before the first day and adding in some first day of school traditions!)

1. Talk it out

Your little people have big feelings, so give those feelings a safe space. Ask your child how they’re feeling about returning to school and listen to their fears or concerns. Simply being there to listen can be hugely beneficial so that anxiety doesn’t build up.

Plus, if you know what is concerning them you can take steps to overcome the fear together. Perhaps they forget what their school even looks like and you can drive by the school together to remind them about everything they loved about it. Or they could be nervous about germs, because as much as we try to shield our children from scary stuff, they hear it. If that’s the case, talk about hand washing, masks, and get them their own little bottle of hand sanitizer if they are old enough to not squirt it out all over the table to create a Barbie ice skating rink. Just an example...

2. Re-establish a routine

Going from pajamas all day and snacks on snacks on snacks to an established schedule that requires real pants is going to be tough (not just on the kids!) However, re-establishing a morning routine can go a long way in helping your children transition.

The week before in person school starts up re-introduce pre-pandemic mornings including alarm clocks, breakfast time, and morning chores. Trying to spring all of this on your children on day 1 is going to be tough, but as they ease back in, the routine will become normal again and children will have an easier time getting into the swing of things. Check out our list of morning routine ideas for school to help you get started.

3. Practice independence

Your children have become accustomed to you being around 24/7 this year. The extra family time is wonderful, but it can make saying goodbye, even for a few hours, really difficult. The separation anxiety is real!

For younger children going back to school, start incorporating more independent play into their days at home. This will give your children a chance to get used to the idea of Mommy and Daddy not being by their side all the time, plus you get a break from playing Paw Patrol. If it makes sense to get a babysitter, that’s another way to ease into this big change of being with another adult besides you.

Older children may need some practice with independence too. Despite how much they always seem to want their own space, tweens and teens have been especially reliant on you this year. Bringing some more independence into the fold may look like you heading out to do errands without checking in by phone the whole time. Or it could be more responsibilities around the house so they remember how to take care of problems on their own. This can be tricky, but reassure your older children that they are super capable and can get back out there on their own. (Then go grab a tissue for yourself because your babies are growing up… tears!)

Hang in there, grownups! The back to school transition is hard but you and your children will work through it together, and we’ll be here along the way with tips and tricks on how to manage a challenging year.